A roadside memorial to a fallen Whiteville firefighter was stolen last week – and one of the men who maintains the site in Ash wants answers.
Michael Stanley died May 11, 2020, from injuries sustained when his motorcycle was struck by a pickup driven by Jamie Smith at the intersection of Ludlum Road and N.C. 130. David Ballengee, himself a retired firefighter, lives within sight of the crash site.
Ballengee said he did not see the crash, but heard it and immediately ran to the scene.
“I didn’t know he was a fireman,” Ballengee said. “I just knew someone was hurt, and I was going to do what I could to help.”
After Stanley’s funeral, members of the Whiteville Fire Department erected a memorial at the site. Ballengee said members of the community joined together to maintain the area around the cross, adding flowers and a solar light.
“Nobody was going to let it get unsightly,” he said. “The Whiteville guys had permission from the landowner to put it up. It was taken care of. We wanted him to be remembered as a husband, a dad and a firefighter.”
On May 21, Ballengee said he got a phone call that the memorial was missing. A man driving an offroad utility vehicle was reportedly seen driving down the road with the cross in the back of the vehicle, Ballengee said.
When he got to the site, everything had disappeared.
“I couldn’t believe it,” he said. “The stones around the base, the light, everything was gone.” Ballengee said the four-wheeler used to take the cross is a specific model. Very few of the machines are in the area.
Whiteville firefighters replaced the memorial the very next day.
Ballengee said the marker is not on the state right of way, and WFD had permission from the landowner to place it on his property. He began posting daily photos from the site on social media, both before and after Whiteville firefighters replaced the memorial.
“I said I was going to post about this every day until the original cross was put back in place,” he said in one post. “Well, the fire department having placed a new cross where the old one was stolen from kind of makes that an unnecessary goal.
“So now what I will do is post about this every day until the responsible party comes forward on one of these posts and apologizes. I don’t want an apology. I’m not asking for an apology for the fire department and the men who were responsible for building the memorial in the first place. I want an apology for the family. Not asking for an explanation not asking for an admission of guilt. I know you’re on Facebook. I know you have access to my account. just come on one of these posts and type the words ‘I’m sorry’.
“I have no realistic expectation that this will ever happen, but if by some chance it does, I will stop posting about it. Until then, these pictures will get posted every day.
“I am not going to let people forget what happened,” he said.
While he has not named the individual suspected of taking the cross, Ballengee said he has since been threatened by a family member.
While visiting a neighbor several days later, Ballengee said, he was approached by the relative, who asked to speak privately with him. Ballengee said he met the man further down the road, where he challenged Ballengee and threatened to assault him.
“I’m a cancer survivor,” he said. “I can’t fight anybody. I might have years ago, but I physically cannot and I will not.”
After several minutes of back forth discussion and more threats, Ballengee said he drove off and contacted the Brunswick County Sheriff’s Office. The case is still under investigation.
Ballengee said he will continue to share photos of the site, including the new memorial. His posts about the memorial have been shared thousands of times, and continue to receive positive comments. He said he has also been warned privately to stop talking about the memorial.
“I am not going to let this go,” he said. “I didn’t know Michael, but he deserves better. No one has the right to steal this just because they don’t like it.
“All the people who did this have to do is publicly apologize. Not to me — to Michael Stanley’s family.”
